I got me some bad news for you, Sunshine
by A Warped View Of Reality
Summary: My sister was back, but without the one I loved, without the one who would have none of me, and now she wasn't here. Sandcest, Kankuro/Temari
1. Wrong

**I got me some bad news for you, Sunshine**

Tell me, is something eluding you, Sunshine? A word of apology perhaps, because you're on your own, and I know at once what's happened. Is something wrong (ohgodthatwordwrongwrongwrong)? Your hair is never down, never allowed to flow free and loose and dull gold. But now it is, as you limp through the door, all bloodied and bruised, loose and matted with sticky crimson. One of your eyes (beautifultealeyesthathadburnedthatveryfirsttime) is swollen shut. You nearly collapse, your fan ripped to shreds.

A name on my lips, even before I rush to your side – exposed and sliced – and you know what it is. You tilt your chin up, single defiant eye watching, scared stiff, for my reaction. It doesn't come. I clamp my lips shut and help you to the bedroom, where I bandage and wash and console you with methodical precision.

"Does he know?" She shakes her head, her face now hidden by her hair. "Where is she?"

She looks up at that, the hurt and pain clearer than anything else in her gaze. She doesn't try and hide it. "On their doorstep. I couldn't stay."

I sink down, a hand over my eyes. "Oh god."

"Kuro," Her hand, three fingers twisted and bent and a mottled purple, lands on my shoulder. I swipe it off, hear her gasp of pain, and ignore it.

"Did you do anything to stop it?"

She gestures impatiently at her beat up body.

"But did you give everything to keep her safe?"

Anger flares in her expression then, bitter and cruel, "Why do you _care_, Kuro! She was a wimp! You've always scoffed at her weakness before, what's different?" She knows what's changed, but she won't admit to it. "Why is it all you men fall for these pathetic excuses for kunoichis here in Konoha!"

I knew that, for once, she wasn't just talking about me, but about her old love, her first love, the ridiculous boy with stupid hair who had left her for some blonde slut. She had cried so hard in my arms that night.

'I haven't fallen for her.' I should say, but I don't. I'm not sure why.

"I feel sorry for him. But for you too. Maybe more for you, though."

"He's lost his wife. I've just lost the girl who would never be mine. There's a difference." I said bitterly.

"Oh yes. She always turned you down, didn't she? Even in those first few weeks of her unhappy marriage. To her _cousin_. Upper-class bastards." She sees me wince at the words, but carries on regardless, because that's who she is. "And then of course they fell in love. Predictable, really. You never stood a chance. Noble and pious, she is." She pauses, then amends, very quietly, "Was."

I sigh, letting out my breath in one rush, and turn back to her, see her standing in the middle of the room, watching me. "Where's Gaara?" She asks.

"Suna."

"Oh." Her eye is wide, hopeful. She needs this, knows I don't, but doesn't care. Or maybe she does care, care too much. Doubtful.

"Come on, then."

I want to prise her off me, through her away and never let her touch me ever again. God knows how wrong this is. "Siblings. Together. Fucking." She panted into my ear. I scrunched my eyes tight and tried to imagine her full hips were the dead girl's narrow ones, her hard, impatient thrusts were mine and the dead girl's tender, loving caresses. That the long hair that got in the way was raven black, and soft, and that the teeth scraping over my abdomen were gentle pink lips. Not the ones that smiled down at me happily, too red and too swollen, and the eyes that looked ever-so-slightly crazy were palest violet, and full of love.

But my sister wouldn't let me forget just _who_ I was fucking. She said my name, the shortened version that only she used, again and again and again, so that when my release finally came, it was my sister's name that escaped my lips. It made her happy, you see.

She tried to make me cuddle her afterwards, but I sat up and pulled on my clothes.

"Kuro..." She said softly, putting her arms around my neck. Her voice had trembled, so I let her keep them there. "I, I love you. You know that, don't you?"

"No, Temari, you don't. I love you, and I loved her. But in very different ways. You should know that."

She sank back down into the bed as I stood up, and suddenly looked very small and lost in the sea of white sheets.

I left her, and was half out the door when a pair of arms looped around my neck.

"I did know, you bastard. I always knew you loved me too much and not in the right way. Well, not the right way, but the _right_ way. You bastard."

I could feel her tears against my neck then. So I turned and took her into my arms. She wasn't happy anymore, I think. But I don't think she really has been for a long time. "Let's just stay here, Sunshine."

"Come back to bed." She said, and we walked back together.

We clung to each other, desperately, and cried silently, bitter, angry tears that shone through with desperation. We stayed like that until morning.


	2. Right

**I got me some bad news for you, Sunshine**

I have the sudden urge to cry, as I stand here, on the doorstep of the rented house. It might as well be ours: we're here so often that it's started to feel like home. No, it's not that, and I know it. It's never where I am, but as long as _you're_ there with me, I'm home. I don't need anyone else. _Certainly_ not Shikamaru.

And there, your face as you open the door, for once, so very vulnerable as your gaze flicks almost imperceptibly down the street. She's not with me, and you know why. Your face closes off instantly, taking in the bloody sticking to my skin, the rips in my clothes. I'm struggling to remain upright, and you're by me the next second. But your concern isn't for me, it's for her, the girl I failed to bring home to you, or to her husband. I try and glare at you through the one eye that I can still use, but I don't think it works. You won't yell, or even be angry at me, though it's my fault, I know you, but you could do something _un-you _, something I can't predict, and I freeze with fear at the possibility.

But you do nothing, just help me to our bedroom. It's not actually your, but you always sleep in my room when I'm here, and I can tell that you have been this last month, since I've been on that bloody mission.

Your voice interrupts my realisation that maybe, just maybe, you'd missed me. "Does he know?" Oh. You mean the Hyuuga. Of course. Its always about the fucking Hyuuga. I shake my head, hide behind my hair. You hate me, now; I can feel it in my bones. "Where is she?"

I can't stand it any longer. I stare at you, letting you see the pain you're causing. How I want to hurt you, so you can _feel_ what it's like. But as for now, I'm still ashamed. No, not ashamed. I'm _never_ ashamed. "On their doorstep. I couldn't stay."

You seem to sort of collapse in on yourself, falling to your knees, "Oh god."

"Kuro..." I reach out, touch your shoulder. You hit my bruised and broken hand away. I gasp.

"Did you do anything to stop it?" Um, hello? See the blood? "But did you give everything to keep her safe?"

Something in me snaps then. Oh, how _dearly_ I want you to _hurt_. "Why do you _care_, Kuro! She was a wimp! You've always scoffed at her weakness before, what's different?" It's a rhetorical question, but I'm not admitting to anything. "Why is it all you men fall for these pathetic excuses for kunoichis here in Konoha!"

Gods, his face filling my vision. I can't think, can't breathe. His smell, the feel of his skin on mine, suffocating me. But you do nothing as I drown in my own memories.

"I feel sorry for him." I say, trying to make you respond to _something_. "But for you too. Maybe more for you, though." It's meant to sound affectionate. Comes out sarcastic.

"He's lost his wife. I've just lost the girl who could never be mine." You sound so lost, so helpless. But you _keep_ mentioning _her_! "There's a difference!" NO THERE'S NOT!

"Oh yes. She always turned you down, didn't she?" Hurthurthurt. "Even in those first few weeks of her unhappy marriage. To her _cousin_. Upper-class bastards." You wince, but not at my language. "And then of course they fell in love. Predictable, really. You never stood a chance. Noble and pious she is." The muscles in you back tense, and I realise my mistake. "Was."

You turn back to me, sighing. The dim streetlight from outside lights up your face. A surge of _want_ floods through me. "Where's Gaara?"

"Suna." You say, knowing why I asked.

"Oh."

"Come on, then."

I crush you to me, fingernails scrabbling at the back of your neck, digging in cruelly. You have always thought I'm the sadistic, cruel, violent one. But if only you could see yourself, now. Your thighs pressing against mine, rolling against the wounds you had only just bandaged, opening them again. Your fingers, knowing precisely where I've been injured, always seemed to find the miniscule places that make me cry out in pain. You flip us over, again and again until we land on the hard floor, the bruise on my tailbone causing me to dig my teeth deep into your neck. You're trying your very hardest to forget. So I don't let you. "Siblings. Together. _Fucking_." I gasp into your ear. You tug on my hair, so hard you must have ripped some out. I say the nickname that only _I_ call you, over and over, shout, whisper, pant, scream, whimper. You can't forget. When you come, it's _my_ name you yell out, clutching at my back. Two seconds later, I'm holding your neck so tight it might snap, and then it's over.

You get up immediately, pick up your clothes and sit on the edge of the bed to pull them on. "Kuro..." I whisper sadly, slipping my arms around your neck, tentatively. You let me keep them there. Just this, you not pushing me away, for _once_, makes me say it. "I, I love you. You know that, don't you?"

Your words, when they finally come, are like a slap in the face. "No, Temari, you don't. I love you, and I loved her. But in very different ways. You should know that."

I draw back from you, my head reeling. You stand, look back, just once, then walk out. I can't move. You had _never_ said that to me before. Of course, I'd always known your thoughts: brother and sister telepathy; but _never_ had I dreamed you say them. Not to me. I'd always thought you cared about me too much to do that, to destroy me so very completely.

That's when I find I can get up, run to you – already by the door – and throw my arms around your neck tightly. I'm crying, I realise, when I rub my cheek against the back of your neck, and feel them on your skin. "I did know, you bastard. I always knew you loved me too much, and not in the right way." I pause on that word: _right_. "Well, not the right way, but the _right _way. You bastard."

You turn, put your arms around me carefully. This only makes me cry more; the realisation that you can be gentle, too. "Let's just stay here, sunshine." You used to call me that, when we were children, playing in the sand fields that stretched for miles. It was always just the two of us.

I find that I can still smile, "Come back to bed, I say, and you take my hand, and we walk down the hallway with my head on your shoulder, my hair falling down my back in a blood-knotted tangle.

We cling to each other, desperately, and cry silently, bitter, angry tears that shine through with desperation. We stay like that until morning.

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I know you little muffins are reading this - i can see yooouuuuu :P ive even had some favourites for this story - but not one review! pretty please?


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